If I Had A Love Story - Chapter 10



Chapter 10

I wished it all to be a dream. I pinched myself and it pained for real. Diya and I started taking strolls round the college every night after dinner. Those night times were those when she was not in all her grace. She was wearing a plain grey T shirt and a pant. Her hair was a mess. It didn't matter, it never did. I still wanted to hold hands with her and walk miles together. It was then I realised that I wasn't merely attracted or infatuated by her beauty. My heart had not just discovered but felt what my mind had overlooked. It was emotions and feelings - I felt good, loved, cared, trusted and affectionate whenever she was around with me (What more does a guy want more than this honestly?).

A single text from her was enough to brighten me up. She was busy rewriting the definition of love in my dictionary transforming it into something meaningful. I was wondering how someone could come into your life suddenly, slowly creeping into your heart until they find a way to stay there permanently and also leave you gasping for breath. It wasn't love at first sight (That has become quite a cliché now). It happened slowly, dragging the unsuspecting prey into her self woven web of love and the prey was now caught in it, struggling to escape. Though it was a wondrous feeling stuck up on someone you love but my mind still resisted the feelings fighting a losing battle with my heart.

A month went by. None of these feelings seemed to go away. "This crush ain't going away" (David Archuleta's Crush song ran in repeat inside my head). I sunk deep into music seeking comfort, and in them too, I found her hidden behind the musical notes. Buried under the depths of rhythms and tunes, cloaked that only my heart could feel and hear her. I badly wanted to confess my feelings for her a lot of times but held back fearing her reaction to it. She was more than my best friend and I didn't want to risk our current relationship by proposing her. I didn't have the courage to do so though.

"Things are better the way they are" I comforted myself.

Finding myself in the company of some elite writers who were seniors of mine, I started the habit of writing inspired by their works. I started off with crappy poems and they still remain the same even now. I wrote only to escape reality and divert my thoughts which were seeking refuge desperately somewhere. Once a heart is in love whatsoever you do to mask, push it away and divert it somewhere, but at the end of the day, it would still return to the soul it loves. Like the way she entered my heart and music, she found her way into my words. I could write about nothing but her. Love is a magnificent art that she has created in my heart. Diya! She's magic!

The torments didn't stop there. I started losing my sleep. It would be 3 or 4 in the morning when I would fall asleep and would wake up again at 7. I would sit on the horizontal slab by the edge of the corridor gazing into the darkness smiling at the beautiful stars and moon (But not as beautiful as her). They were the only company I had during the time. The chill night breeze would bring in wonderful memories of her. I would sit there for hours, lost in her looking at them, narrating them how I felt. I wished I could tell Diya too but fear gripped me tight. Along with insomnia came hallucinations as a free gift. I started mistaking people for her from a distance. My thoughts were so much set upon her.

Unable to take this any further, I confronted my feelings and I finally agreed that I was in love after all. Then I decided that I would just confess them to her at any cost. I felt like a seaman with his ship in the middle of the sea who had broken his compass, battling a storm, lost in the seas of youth.

Comments

  1. UnknownMay 4, 2020 at 9:49 PM

    Va macha va macha. Love symptoms vandrichu

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SarukrishnaMay 5, 2020 at 7:45 AM

      காதல் வந்திருச்சு ஆசையில் ஓடி வந்தேன்... 😂😂😂

      Delete
  2. UnknownMay 5, 2020 at 1:35 PM

    Enna Oru theiveega kaadhal

    ReplyDelete

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